I think I'm being honest when saying that I'm not sure really where to start, so I'm going to feel my way with this as I am with life at the moment. I'm piecing together a new me, a recreation, the old me - perhaps more appropriately a happy person who is be fun to be around, deals better with stress, and manage my condition so that I get the very most out of what life has to offer. Look at it through the eyes of a child rather than someone who's fought hard for things all her life, who has never honestly believed that she has ever been good enough, so has continually sought the title perfectionist when indeed no such title can be earned.
I've managed to establish that I am better when I start to routinely do jobs around the house or with the children 'pootling' is my favourite term, not doing anything with the gusto that I used to, but also, not being sedentary and feeling as though I am watching life pass me by. It's like dipping my toe in to test the temperature of life. So this is as it is, what will be will be, of that I have no choice, but the choice that I do have is how I deal with it, whether I let it totally consume me or, whether I roll with the changes, and just keep pootling along aiming and striving towards positivity and life rather than depression and refuge!
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